Tuesday, Thursday and Wandering All Over

Tuesday afternoon I started my 6 miles of fartleks and I was bored before I even began.  I knew I needed to change it up.  So here's what happened.

5 minute walk at 3.5
5 minute run at 5.5
13 minute fast run at 6.0
5 minute walk at 4.0
5 minute walk at 5.5
15 minute fast run at 6.0!!
5 minute walk at 4.0
4 minute walk at 5.5
9:35 fast run at 6.0 to finish 6 miles at 66:35.

The end time wasn't my best but those long runs were the farthest I've ever gone that fast.  It felt great!

On Thursday afternoon I just had to do a 5 mile AYF (As You Feel) run and I decided to head back outside with the Garmin.  I ran the first mile in 10:30!  Outside!  I did my fastest ever outdoor 5K at 33:09!  And I did the entire 5 miles in 54 minutes.  I was very proud of that run!  And apparently changing the fartlek routine helped me gain some ground this week!

Now for the wandering all around.  Yes, I'm trying all kinds of new routes and having fun wandering around Brighton.  But I was talking about my eye. 

For those of you that don't know, I am blind in my right eye.  I had 5 surgeries on my eye from the ages of 5 to 12 that left my eye wandering all the way up and to the right.  I had my last eye surgery at 12 to correct the position of the eyeball.  It was a huge success.  It was centered and I had full mobility.  I was a happy girl.

24 years later my eye has become unaligned.  I'm confident that this was caused from running and the constant strain and pounding that I've put on the muscles.  I have spoken to a local eye doctor that told me this was completely out of his realm and that I needed to be in touch with a pediatric ophthalmologist that does surgeries on strabismus.  Well, James just had strabismus surgery in May!  And I happened to have the doctor's cell number!  So I texted him, he texted back and told me he was in Hawaii and so we decided that email was the best way to communicate.  After sending pictures and information I now have an appointment on October 1st which will most likely lead to surgery to correct the position again.

I am telling you this for a few reasons. 

1. So you will pray for me.  I HATE!!, no..LOATHE!! surgeries. 

2. I am incredibly insecure right now.  I have been told that it is not nearly as obvious as I feel it is...but to me it feels like that is all people can see.  I feel like if I just let it all out there then you will know everything and you won't feel awkward for asking and I won't feel like there is a big elephant in the room that we are all ignoring. 

3.  And last, it's prayers again.  I have a huge big fat feeling that I'm going to be told not to run anymore.  It may be stop running until surgery.  It may be stop running after surgery so this doesn't happen again.  Either way...I'm getting in a half!  If I have to find one in the next few weeks and run it and then quit..I'll do it.  And then I'll take up swimming.  Or cycling.  Or whatever.  But I'm going to ask for prayers that surgery has come far enough in the last 24 years that they will fix this and I will be able to live a normal life again.  Please pray for that!

I cried like a baby when I finally realized what was going on.  I had a big ol' pity party and sobbed and snotted and acted like a big ol' baby.  And my sweet, sweet sister Jennifer sat on the other end of the phone telling me that she loves me, that I'm beautiful and that I would find my way through this.

And I will!

Let's just put this in perspective.  I haven't lost a child.  Or a husband.  Or a limb.  We are talking about an eye that was already blind and has moved out of position.  Other than a little confidence and vanity...I'm not losing a whole lot here.  And I would take my situation over millions of others.

God is good!  Whether His plans are for me to come out getting what I want or if they entail something completely different...He knows best!  And I will thank Him for constantly for holding me and taking care of me even when I don't know what His plans are.

I started blogging again to be able to keep the memories of my road to a half marathon.  I never, ever, saw this as being one of the curves.  Who knew?!  Anyways, I will always be proud of what I've done so far and I will pray that I will get to do so much more in the future.

I know that was long.  I'm sorry. 

It's a big weekend...I have another PR to set...10 miles on Sunday.  Yikes!  I'll try the Guu this time and let you know what I think. 

Be Blessed!  And be a blessing! 

Keep Running!